The Sexuality Temptation, Balancing Hormones and the Head

As I had my early morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column caught my eye. A reader composed in with a dating dilemma and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women utilize sex to obtain love, and men utilize love to obtain sex." This is a terrific summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap is comparable to the Love Trap, where singles translate good sex as love. But those who fall into the Sex Trap go even further because for these singles, making love carries tremendous meaning and effects.

Singles fall into the Sex Trap in one (or both) of two ways:

A.they believe sex is a required test of compatibility, (if the sex readies then the relationship will be good also).

B.more typically, all consciousness goes out the window, and one or both previously level-headed singles consider themselves a committed couple as quickly as they have sex.
So, rather than taking a look at whether this other individual may be a match on levels besides physical destination-- such as long-lasting requirements, requirements, and wants-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to keep in touch with reality when all those hormonal agents are running wild. Our body responds to someone we are drawn in to by producing hormonal agents such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural mood enhancers), and testosterone ( boosts libido), that makes the chance to make love with somebody we are attracted to exceptionally hard to withstand. Then, after orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts upon the hypothalamus to produce feelings), that makes us feel extremely near and bonded with our sex partner.

These chemical responses are strong and uncontrolled , leading to effective sensations of attraction, enjoyment, nearness, well-being, and love .

When problems emerge, those who fall into the Sex Trap often justify by thinking, "Well, we've got issues, however the sex is fantastic!" They more than likely wouldn't confess, however they focus on physical intimacy and relate to the rest as optional. Their main searching tools are sexual tourist attraction and physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI coach who works primarily with gay males, states that much of his customers have actually fallen under the Sex Trap.

" For gay men especially in metropolitan areas, sex is easily available, and that in itself is a trap," North says. Why waste your time if the sex isn't really going to be great?".

North adds, "I believe this is a ' person' thing rather than a 'gay' thing.".
I do wish to explain that chemistry is necessary. Chemistry is a given that we can't control in a relationship; it is either there or click over here not there, and visit their website it must be there for the partnership to work. If not there, we can't "make" chemistry happen, though in some cases it can grow in time.

When the hormone-induced intoxication wears off and truth hits, Singles who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry danger relationship failure.

To prevent the Sex Trap, you need to stabilize your heart (and hormones) with your head. This suggests integrating chemistry with common sense. While great sex is essential for a sustainable relationship, you require to make your partner options by paying full attention to your vision, requirements, goals, and worths -- while feeling all those amazing sparks!

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